Funny Life Quotes - Funny Quotes about Life

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
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Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.
-Carl Sandburg
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Life is just a phase you're going through...you'll get over it.
- Anonymous
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There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
 -Oscar Wilde
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Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
 -Jean-Paul Sartre
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An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived.

-Herbert Samuel
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The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat.
 -Lilly Tomlin
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For most men life is a search for the proper manilla envelope in which to get themselves filed.
 -Clifton Fadiman
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Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.
 -Brendan Gill
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Were it offered to my choice, I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults in the first.
 -Benjamin Franklin
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No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you.

-Sholom Aleichem
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There are good days and there are bad days, and this is one of them.

-Lawrence Welk
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The basic rule of human nature is that powerful people speak slowly and subservient people quickly -- because if they don't speak fast nobody will listen to them.
-Michael Caine
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It's possible, you can never know, that the universe exists only for me. If so, it's sure going well for me, I must admit.

-Bill Gates
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Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

-Will Rogers
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When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
 -Mark Twain
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Life is not so bad if you have plenty of luck, a good physique and not too much imagination.

 -Christopher Isherwood
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The cost of living's going up, and the chance of livin's going down.

-Flip Wilson
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After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say "I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER." 
 -Willliam S. Burroughs
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You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.

-Chris Rock
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Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea and sink.

-Shunryu Suzuki Roshi
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Nothing matters very much, and very few things matter at all.
-Arthur Balfour
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All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
 -Sean O'Casey
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Life is so unlike theory.
-Anthony Trollope
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There must be more to life than having everything.
 -Maurice Sendak
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Life is like a cobweb, not an organization chart.
 -Ross Perot
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Life is a horizontal fall.
-Jean Cocteau
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In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular.
 -Kathleen Norris