Sunday, May 23, 2010

Alleged Appraisal Putdowns

  • Not recommended for use of course-rather to illustrate how not to do it.
  • Takes him two hours to watch sixty minutes.
  • If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the oceans..."
  • If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you would get change...
  • If he were any more stupid he'd have to be watered twice a week.
  • Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
  • Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
  • Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.
  • A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.
  • If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one.
  • He brings joy whenever he leaves the room.
  • He has a knack for making strangers immediately.
  • He would argue with a signpost.
  • He's been working with glue too much.
  • I would like to go hunting with him sometime.
  • He doesn't have ulcers but he's a carrier.
  • Got a full sixpack but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.
  • His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.
  • This person has delusions of adequacy.
  • Since my last report has reached rockbottom, and has started to dig.
  • Sets low standards and consistently fails to achieve them.
  • Has the wisdome of youth and the energy of old age.
  • Works well under constant supervision and when cornere like a rat in a trap.
  • You are on the crest of a slump.
  • The lights are on but nobody's at home.
  • The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.

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